Patron of the Week: Ms. Here’s-The-Clue-Phone.Oh-For-Me?Yeah-You.Really?Yeah-Really.

This week’s Patron of the Week comes from Teenage Wasteland.

Please welcome Ms. Here’s-The-Clue-Phone.Oh-For-Me?Yeah-You.Really?Yeah-Really.

She walked into the library with her brother, who looked to be about eight or nine, and asked me:

“Is it…um [a snap of bubblegum, at least this is how I remember it even though it might not have happened this way]…OK if I look around?”

My immediate answer:

“No. This is a library. We don’t allow looking around.”

I wish I had been more on my game and answered one of the following:

“Yes, but only if you’re going to buy something, young lady.”

“Yes, it is OK if you look around, but not your snotty little brother.”

“No, however, here’s a blindfold. You are allowed to sniff around.”

OR maybe, just maybe, you have a better retort with which I could have come back since lately I have been distracted. Let me know in the comments. Try not to use profanity…especially you, Moooooog, if you’re reading this, which I know might be really, really difficult for you.

17 responses to “Patron of the Week: Ms. Here’s-The-Clue-Phone.Oh-For-Me?Yeah-You.Really?Yeah-Really.

  1. You let a kid chomping on bubblegum loose in a library? That was probably a mistake, you just don’t know it yet. 😉

  2. Wow! I know people don’t read as much as they should but it’s still shocking to know that some people, especially kids, don’t know how a library works.

  3. At least she was bringing the little brother to the library to see it. She could have taken him to the arcade or the porn shop. Change out of those cranky pants, Bryan!

  4. I’ve gotten to the point where stupid makes me smile. My favorite exchange after ordering dinner at work from a local food establishment:

    “Hello– I’d like to place an order for pickup. This is for 911.”
    “Okay, what’s your phone number?”

  5. Awww: maybe she thought she needed parental supervision. 😉

    Once, when I worked in my college library, these three teenage girls came in who were obviously not students at the college, walked up to the desk, and asked me “Where the books?” Later, the lead one threatened to beat me up, because she thought I was mocking her. 😮

    • I meant to get to this last night, but I was in the middle of watching a movie. However, you were too at the time. Nice job of multitasking there, Eva.

      What did you say back to her that made her think you were mocking her?

  6. “Like Duh ! This is the fuckin library ! (Insert snarky response here)”

  7. Ha, ha! I thought your response was quite ‘on the nose’! I might have said, “No, you are not allowed to look around, but you are allowed to read, that is, if you can read.”

    Snarky, I know. Still, I think your’s was good.

    • That’s a good one, 00dozo. I’m just not very quick on my feet sometimes. I always think of the snarkier responses later — or keep them in my head, which probably is a good thing when you’re supposed to be in the job of customer service. 🙂

  8. “Sure. That’ll be $25 for the first ten minutes, and then a dollar a minute after that.”

  9. It makes me seriously sad for the state of our future. Parents and teachers are seriously failing our children (and this is coming from an ex-teacher who did, indeed, teach my pre-kindergartners about books and libraries.)

    • On another day, one of the teenage patrons told me she doesn’t read much. I asked her why. She said there wasn’t anything that interested her and that she’d rather watch TV. That to me is sad. I mean, yes, admittedly I watch a lot of Netflix, but I still do read from time to time too…and even having only read about a dozen books so far this year, I’ve probably read more than most teenagers. Sad but true.