This is a guest post from my sister, Lisa, because she thought it might offend the readers of her own blog, Boondock Ramblings. However, she thought y’all were beyond offense, so here goes:
After telling a story about pinching my boob in the desk drawer at work (Yes. Yes I did.), my co-worker launched into a tale about anal sex.
Yes. Yes she did.
“Let me tell you what I asked the doctor…”
No. Really. Please don’t.
“I was in the doctor’s office about my IBS, you know how I have IBS and she had those drawings up there, you know, of your anus and stuff and I asked her if it was safe.”
“You know…anal sex…I asked her if it was safe.”
In case you are wondering, her doctor said it can cause some negative long-term effects. Just in case you were thinking of..well, you know what I mean.
I must have looked as horrified as I felt when she finished her “story” because she said — as if to make me less uncomfortable:
“Not for me. I mean for my daughter…”
I was even more horrified that she was asking for her former (maybe current) crack whore 21-year old daughter.
Instead of hanging out to say things like, “Are you serious?” or “Did you just say that to me?”, I immediately backed away and went back to my desk to pretend the conversation never happened.
The next day I asked my co-worker what she had thought about that engaging conversation.
“Wasn’t that nice?” she asked, deadpan –a very bored looking expression on her face. “Yeah I had to hear about that last week…”
And, sad to say, these are stories we often hear from this particular co-worker. Each of them just as uncomfortable and awkward than the one before that.