Last time I said I’d get to talking about the comedy and the tragedy that is my car, so that must mean that I get to talking about the car in this post, right? Wrong. Instead, in today’s posts — plural — I am going to talk about instant message (IM) conversations I’ve had with The Wife and then IMs I’ve had with others.
The other morning The Wife and I were talking via instant message about the possibility of my going for a run that morning before I had to begin working on a project. [Bracketed are thoughts that weren’t included, which might have infuriated The Wife even more, if some of them had been included.]
The Wife: I just looked at the radar.
It’s a big system.
The Wife: We’re only just getting the front edge of it now.
It’s about four counties big with more behind it coming from Jamestown. [At least, this is where I thought, which didn’t make any sense to me.]
Me: Jamestown? [in my head, I am thinking of the colony, the aforementioned linked one where they have all those reenactments and stuff.]
The Wife: NY
That’s the top of the system.
Me: I know but why would it come from NY. Usually, it comes from our west.
Still in Pa and Oh [and no, that’s not Pa as in Kettle and Oh as in Sandra]
The Wife: Um, that is west of us.
Me: New York isn’t west…that’s um…north of us.
The Wife: It’s a big skinny system.
It’s going right across PA but it’s topheavy to the north. [At least she knows how to use her state abbreviations.]
Oh, go look at the radar, captain weather-genius.
Me: I didn’t say I was captain-weather genius. [Note: See the first part of the conversation, where I didn’t say I was captain-weather genius or even captain weather-genius or Captain Weather Genius, no matter how it’s spelled or capitalized or not, with or without hypens.]
I just know my geography.
The Wife: Jamestown is NORTH WEST of here.
Me: NORTH. [since then, of course I have learned I may know MY geography, but it may not be other people’s geography, as according to a quick search on Google Maps, Jamestown is not only NORTH of where we live in northcentral Pennsylvania, but also WEST. Go figure.]
The Wife: Whatevs. Go work. [My wife is 38, we have no children and yet she uses the word “Whatevs.” I don’t know where she gets it from. Whatevs.]
The ironic thing is that after all this, it didn’t even rain, and I didn’t make my run, because I thought it was going to rain.