I almost drove my car off the side of the road and into the fence that surrounds our local veterinary hospital after reading the sign it had posted for animal boarders. If you can’t see it in the photo at left, look closely in photo below, at right.
That’s right: “Air conditioned boarding Cable TV Open 7 Days” [emphasis mine]. Cable TV? Wow. I just imagine Rex riding by with his head out the window of his owner’s pickup truck barking up a storm when he sees that, as if to say, “Hey, Billy Bob, that’s where I want to go when you go fishing with the boys up in Canada? I love to watch me some SportsCenter.”
Or Mittens as she’s on her way out from the clinic one day meowing to her old lady owner as if to say, “Oh, Mrs. Haversham, could you please leave me here so I don’t miss my Oprah? You know how I love my Oprah, how I almost claw your eyes out if I can’t watch her ever day at 4.” (Personally, I’d claw my own eyes out if I was forced to watch Oprah every day, but then that’s just me.)
And what happens when the cats, dogs, parakeets, pet crocodiles and other assorted critters don’t agree on what each of them want to watch? You think it’s bad at the local retirement home (of which we have about half a dozen in our little town) when those folks can’t agree between reruns of Murder She Wrote and Baywatch. You ain’t seen, or let alone heard, nothing until you’ve seen and heard your grandmother’s Persian, Millie, screech at the top of her lungs because she’s missing the latest episode of All My Children and your uncle Bocephus’s bulldog moan because he’s not able to see that CSI rerun that he’s only seen 20 times on Spike – both at the same time. Lemme tell you.